Meet Jessica
Jessica is a 30-year-old woman living in a major city. Her company promoted her to a middle management role about a year ago. With the salary increase, she and her significant other moved into a more expensive apartment in a trendier neighborhood. At first, the additional income, physical move, and new lifestyle fulfilled many of Jessica’s perceived needs.
Peace didn’t last long. She started having difficulty sleeping as noisy construction began nearby, adding to the rising stress of her current responsibilities. Waking up tired every morning is taking its toll on her. Her attitude has changed, and she’s become quick to anger and lash out. Conflicts brewing at home compound the overall stress she has been feeling. At work, her colleagues and teammates perceive a lack of focus. Jessica lost the upbeat nature that made her a great leader. Her supervisor has already met with her, and it seems her job is in jeopardy.
The Hierarchy
Many of us are familiar with Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. At its base are physiological and safety needs. The next level tends to love and belonging needs, followed by the need for esteem. Finally, at the top of the pyramid rests the need for self-actualization.
The theory states that as we meet our primary needs, we discover and will want to address the higher levels. Whenever any stage in the hierarchy seems threatened, we become stressed. Instability creeps in, making it difficult to focus and continue growing in the higher needs.
An aspect the visual model fails to depict is that our relationship with our needs is dynamic. It is more of a system of latent needs, which fluctuate over time and with the circumstances. In all likelihood, most of us will never have to worry about not having food, shelter, or clothing, and many safety needs will not be at risk. Though, it’s more complex than we might think. I want to use Jessica’s hypothetical yet plausible and relatable story to explain.
If we look at Jessica’s moment in life, we can suddenly see how several of her needs at different levels are breaking down. Her lack of sleep is impacting her physiological needs. Now that her boss is involved, her employment feels vulnerable, affecting her sense of safety. If fired, Jessica knows she will lose the recognition and status that her promotion meant. She would also have to give up her apartment, directly affecting her esteem needs. At the same time, her relationship is suffering from all the turmoil she is facing.
Add to this scenario our subjectiveness. As our lives change, we also begin redefining our needs to different standards. For most of Jessica’s life, she has never needed shelter from the harsh environment or faced famine. It is normal for her to have an apartment with plumbing and air conditioning. She is also used to having three healthy, protein-rich meals and weekly restaurant visits. These needs are perceived and do not reflect the essentials. Jessica won’t be going hungry or homeless.
Her expectations, as all of ours, are filtered based on the patterns we’ve grown accustomed to and external reference points. Social media raises the bar even higher on what “basic” means. Judging from our feed, we are entitled to a more luxurious life. In addition, our brain plays against us. Due to our innate negativity bias, Jessica will likely focus on all the negative things and predict adverse outcomes.
Suddenly, the stability she had achieved disappeared. In Jessica’s mind, she faces an existential threat.
As we can see, our needs are interconnected and interdependent. They are a complex construction of perceptions, assumptions, and legitimate concerns. Imagine going to work every day with all that on your shoulders. Jessica is facing multiple fire alarms. Where do you think her focus is throughout the day? Where should she aim her efforts to fix the situation? Is she at the best place to go that extra mile all organizations wish they could get?
Jessica is accountable for responding to the best of her ability. There are straightforward fixes, such as improving her sleep quality. She can wear earplugs or, at an extreme, move if the construction lasts for months.
Successfully addressing her other challenges requires a certain level of self-awareness and agency. For starters, she has to diagnose the root causes of her situation. Then, Jessica must work independently and ask for support through coaching, therapy, or talking to her boss or HR. In addition, she will need to develop other skills to solve the problems at hand.
There are also plenty of things that her organization can do to support her.
Being the Boss
Now, let’s roleplay a little. Imagine you are Jessica’s boss. You see how she shows up for work. You probably notice her performance dip and attitude change. But, you have very little visibility on her life outside of work. You are unaware of her lack of sleep, relationship problems, and fears. Many of her profound needs feel at risk.
The information available makes it understandable to question choosing her as a high-potential individual. She is no longer the person you invested in. Coaching, promoting, and setting Jessica as the gold standard of excellence appears to be a liability.
Traditional thinking tells us to leave our personal problems at the door. However, Jessica’s issues are connected. Her story shows that her personal and professional lives are intertwined. Changes to any dimension affect whether her needs are met or threatened. It’s impossible to compartmentalize.
“The leader’s job is to create and nurture the culture we all need to do our best work. And so anytime you play a role in doing that, you are exercising leadership.” – Amy Edmondson, The Fearless Organization.
Let’s build on Amy Edmondson’s definition of leadership. You are responsible for creating and nurturing a culture and environment where Jessica can do her best. Your contribution begins by listening to and understanding where she is. How secure is she feeling within her hierarchy of needs? How are the work environment and conditions impacting her perception of stability?
The insights discovered through empathetic conversations with Jessica can surface opportunities to support her. More importantly, this information contextualizes Jessica as a whole. She is a person who transcends any one dimension of her life.
As an organization, we can safely assume that many of our coworkers face similar challenges. Essential life skills such as mindfulness and emotional intelligence can be taught and developed. Both can impact how she and others release stress and treat others. Supervisors and coaches can offer a safe space to vent. They can provide advice and direction. These actions create psychological safety, supporting her as she gains confidence in her new position. With a better understanding of her challenges, imagining many other ways to help Jessica is easy.
We know that life is even more complicated than Jessica’s example. And she is not alone in the system. Everyone has a complex life. Inevitably, we bring that dynamic complexity and our filtered hierarchy of needs to our organizations and overlapping, interdependent systems.
As leaders, understanding our coworkers’ unfulfilled or latent needs gives us valuable information. With it, we can create a safer and more engagement-conducive environment. When combined with work that aligns with our growth journey, we focus our energy and become constructive contributors, unleashing our potential.
